How to appropriately respond to an elephant mock charge: stay the fuck away from them to begin with. How bout dat?
Reasonable_Laugh8843 on
Impressive how his pants can fit his gigantic balls
K1ran43v3r on
Instructions unclear, user dead.
SweetWhisperGlow on
If you ever find yourself in this situation, just remember that ears out is a bluff charge. Ears back means you’re fucked.
Ironyismylife28 on
I believe the colour of pants must be of great importance!! You can’t see the shit stain AT ALL!
Mysterious-School152 on
Is shitting yourself an integral part of this? Cause if that elephant charged at me that’s what would happen.
HugoZHackenbush2 on
I’m outta there fast, the charge real or mock is totally irrelephant..
PolkaDotQueen3 on
That’s a brave man there, but I think that’s way too risky
Coinsworthy on
What was that saying again? If it’s black fight back if it’s grey it’ll just go away?
getritch99 on
Old news
ffstis on
It’s all easy and done until a 3 tonne elephant is running your way.
CW-Eight on
I was on a walking safari in the Okavango Delta Botswana and we were mock charged. Guide was just saying over and over again “don’t run! don’t run! don’t run” while my body was saying “run! rub! run!”.
I always wondered where the ‘shit your pants’ expression comes from – almost found out that day. That was the most terrifying experience of my life, and my guts turned watery. Didn’t have to clean my undies but I get it now.
And, yes, ears were out. Guide said if they were back we would have scattered.
aleqqqs on
This reminds me of the story of Peter Davies, who in 1986 was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University .
On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Peter approached it very carefully.
He got down on one knee and inspected the elephant’s foot and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it. As carefully and as gently as he could, Peter worked the wood out with his hunting knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot. The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments. Peter stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned, and walked away. Peter never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.
Twenty years later, Peter was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teenaged son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Peter and his son Cameron were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Peter, lifted its front foot off the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.
Remembering the encounter in 1986, Peter couldn’t help wondering if this was the same elephant. Peter summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Peter legs and slammed him against the railing, killing him instantly.
Probably wasn’t the same elephant.
Headline-Skimmer on
Better yet, leave them the hell alone?
NoAkuBirds_808 on
Time to change underwear
Hefty-Struggle-4325 on
Now I know how to handle my wife’s bluff charges. Eyes on the ears, boys, we’ll make it through.
Titoy82 on
Step 2 – replace underwear
soluduis_snke on
![gif](giphy|3oKIPoZniJ2hq8IItG|downsized)
Vellarain on
Why does the elephant look so sassy in their strut after the mock charge?
DickWoodReddit on
Good thing I wore my brown pants
Ojay1091 on
Everything In my body would be saying, “you better fuckin move man”.
Zugaxinapillo on
In case it’s not a bluff, rolling forward will work. The i-frames will keep you safe.
blindreefer on
![gif](giphy|GHLmhJ0RQhm25GYaRx)
Apprehensive_Fig4458 on
Can confirm, this is absolutely terrifying. And I was in a car, not on the ground that time
JeffSergeant on
If its not a mock charge you respond in exactly the same way, you just die?
CharmingHorror8040 on
Holy shit this would be amazing in a video game having to learn and be able to tell if the animal is faking it or not.
Edit: something like the elephant Ai in far cry, add this too.
29 Comments
How to appropriately respond to an elephant mock charge: stay the fuck away from them to begin with. How bout dat?
Impressive how his pants can fit his gigantic balls
Instructions unclear, user dead.
If you ever find yourself in this situation, just remember that ears out is a bluff charge. Ears back means you’re fucked.
I believe the colour of pants must be of great importance!! You can’t see the shit stain AT ALL!
Is shitting yourself an integral part of this? Cause if that elephant charged at me that’s what would happen.
I’m outta there fast, the charge real or mock is totally irrelephant..
That’s a brave man there, but I think that’s way too risky
What was that saying again? If it’s black fight back if it’s grey it’ll just go away?
Old news
It’s all easy and done until a 3 tonne elephant is running your way.
I was on a walking safari in the Okavango Delta Botswana and we were mock charged. Guide was just saying over and over again “don’t run! don’t run! don’t run” while my body was saying “run! rub! run!”.
I always wondered where the ‘shit your pants’ expression comes from – almost found out that day. That was the most terrifying experience of my life, and my guts turned watery. Didn’t have to clean my undies but I get it now.
And, yes, ears were out. Guide said if they were back we would have scattered.
This reminds me of the story of Peter Davies, who in 1986 was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University .
On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Peter approached it very carefully.
He got down on one knee and inspected the elephant’s foot and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it. As carefully and as gently as he could, Peter worked the wood out with his hunting knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot. The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments. Peter stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned, and walked away. Peter never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.
Twenty years later, Peter was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teenaged son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Peter and his son Cameron were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Peter, lifted its front foot off the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.
Remembering the encounter in 1986, Peter couldn’t help wondering if this was the same elephant. Peter summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Peter legs and slammed him against the railing, killing him instantly.
Probably wasn’t the same elephant.
Better yet, leave them the hell alone?
Time to change underwear
Now I know how to handle my wife’s bluff charges. Eyes on the ears, boys, we’ll make it through.
Step 2 – replace underwear
![gif](giphy|3oKIPoZniJ2hq8IItG|downsized)
Why does the elephant look so sassy in their strut after the mock charge?
Good thing I wore my brown pants
Everything In my body would be saying, “you better fuckin move man”.
In case it’s not a bluff, rolling forward will work. The i-frames will keep you safe.
![gif](giphy|GHLmhJ0RQhm25GYaRx)
Can confirm, this is absolutely terrifying. And I was in a car, not on the ground that time
If its not a mock charge you respond in exactly the same way, you just die?
Holy shit this would be amazing in a video game having to learn and be able to tell if the animal is faking it or not.
Edit: something like the elephant Ai in far cry, add this too.
Here’s an easier way: don’t go near the elephants
Done this. It works until it doesn’t.
Elephant: “Oh my bad g”