Example: SHITTING MYSELF ON STAGE!

    by Ok-Calligrapher-9699

    27 Comments

    1. TheVoiceInZanesHead on

      Taco Bell ’cause I ate half a million chalupas, and I got fat

      Panasonic they never said I shouldn’t use their microwave to dry off my cat

      Earthlink ’cause I called ’em up, and they had the nerve to put me on hold

      Starbucks ’cause I spilled a frappucino in my lap, and brr, it was cold

      Toys ‘R’ Us ’cause I swallowed a Nerf Ball and nearly choked to death

      Petco ’cause I ate a bag of kitty litter and now I’ve got bad breath

      Coca Cola, yo ’cause I put my finger down in a bottle and it got stuck

      Delta Airlines ’cause they sold me a ticket to New Jersey I went there, and it sucked

    2. Stamps.

      Like postage stamps.

      It’s the most mundane and innocuous thing I can think of that’s only vaguely connected to current government events, so it makes sense.

    3. EmptyEstablishment78 on

      Trump hates; little baby ducks, old pick-up trucks
      Slow movin’ trains and rain
      Trump hates; little country streams, sleep without dreams
      Sunday school in May and hay

    4. EcstaticHelicopter on

      Somebody needs to take this shambling shit filled rotten orange’s phone out of his newborn baby sized hand, change his diaper and put him to bed.

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