When you’re down so bad you start seeing mermaids.

    by Polibiux

    8 Comments

    1. “Look at the size of that one!.”
      “We’ve been over this Karl, that’s a whale, not a mermaid.”

    2. Let’s cut the charade, you are no wife of mine

      You’ve been tryin’ to take my life this whole time

      I know underwater, there are packs of you hiding

      Yeah, I know exactly what you are, a siren

      My real wife knows I’m not scared of the water

      And my real wife knows I don’t have a daughter

      But while you were so focused on turning my men into snacks

      You didn’t notice that your friends got snatched

    3. Was a sailor back in the day.

      Can confirm after a while people get desperate for good food, alcohol and sex.

      And by after a while, I mean about 3 days on average. Granted, that doesn’t mean they don’t find a way to get those things. Sailors would sneak vodka onboard in water bottles. People would get caught having sex in isolated areas(ventilation rooms were a favorite).

      We literally caught a guy with a McDonalds cheeseburger 2 weeks after leaving port. Think about that.

      It’s also why I don’t believe there’s much “Buried Pirate Treasure” to be found, because most sailors will blow every dollar they have within hours of hitting port on Food, Drink and Sex before coming back to the ship broke.

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